“Sharing our desires can help strengthen intimate bonds and trust,” says Nugent. Outside the bedroom (or kitchen counter, or really wherever the urge strikes), even the hottest dirty talk phrases can come across as naughty and awkward in the best of scenarios, and filthy and degrading in the worst. And yet, in the heat of the sexual moment, dirty talk can be arousing for many—that is, if you know what dirty things to say during sex to get you and your partner going (more on that below). Create space outside of any sexual activity for reflection. Conjuring material for dirty talk won’t feel so daunting if you spend time thinking and talking about sex beyond the heat of the moment.
Loyal Drinkers (?)
By talking dirty, you unleash the sexual and sensual conversation. It starts with words you speak, and carries into your physical actions. If you find your partner is struggling to stay aroused once you get sex started or just doesn’t show any interest in having sex to begin with, these naughty phrases will wake up a part of their brains that has lain dormant. In the face of such permissiveness, nostalgia for the illicit leads us to take absurd measures to recover our fading belief in the ever-elusive quality of the obscene. We fight to maintain the sensation of illicitness by making a continual series of updates and revisions, trying one word and then the next to avoid the obsolescence that is in some sense the fate of dirty talk. Talking the talk is a huge part of a healthy sex life.
- I want to take you on a midnight drive and then fuck you senseless on the hood of the car.
- This is especially crucial if your partner is a woman.
- I have no powers of concentration right now.
- She also advises people to stop things if they are unsure of the non-verbal or verbal reactions they garner from the experience.
How do you talk dirty even if you’re shy?
Just whispering something fairly innocent in his ear like, “when we are alone, you have no idea the things I’m going to do to you,” is often sufficient. Then smile and look into his eyes, and he’ll know your sincere, but also incredibly desirable. If you’ve never talked dirty to your man before, or it’s been a long time since you were both horny teenagers, start slow, without being extremely explicit.
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But while porn stars may have no qualms about uttering filthy phrases during sex, many of us regular folk tend to blush at the mere thought of saying such words out loud. Even the phrase “dirty talk” sounds shameful or bad. You’ll find lots of examples so you can do it perfectly. When you’re looking to spice things up in the bedroom, dirty talk can be a fun thing to turn to.
Nothing gets a person going quite like a round of dirty text messages or phone sex. Lucky for you, we’ve compiled the best dirty talk examples to add to your repertoire. Start with phrases that are simple and that make sense. “I want you so bad,” is a perfect place to start. You can also see how reactive your partner is and continue down a path she’s responding well to.
In other words, engaging in a dialogue that feels good with our partner can heighten the sexual experience. Experimenting with role play is another way to break out of formulaic dirty talk and inspire more creativity. Couples can switch up the setting and pretend to be strangers meeting up at a bar or hotel, but you don’t have to orchestrate something elaborate if you can’t or don’t want to deal with the hassle in real life. You can also try on different sex positions or acts—like anal sex or learning how to squirt during sex—by including them in your word play first. Depending on your and your partner’s reactions, you might discover dirty things to physically explore later.